“The rules are made up and the points don’t matter.”
I’ve always loved this line from the iconic improv comedy show “Whose Line is it Anyway.” Now, before you get caught up in reality testing here… yes of course there are some rules, and there are some points that matter… and there are A LOT of little rules we make up for ourselves so we can award ourselves little points that don’t really matter.
Another way of putting this is to acknowledge that sometimes we hold ourselves to unreasonable expectations in a race for outcomes. Maybe something like “If I could only diet effectively and exercise enough to weigh 200 pounds, then I know I would be happy.”
Do you see the hidden rules there? The points that don’t really matter?
I’m not saying that we shouldn’t strive to live our lives in a way in which we can be at a healthy ideal weight. There are tons of physiological and psychological benefits associated with healthy lifestyle patterns that include healthy eating and adequate exercise. What I am advocating for is living that lifestyle instead of building up an artificial structure of rules so we can award ourselves metaphorical points when we attain some abstract metric of success.
How many aspects of our lives are influenced by the framework of: “if only I (did this thing), then I would (get this other thing), and then I would feel (some positive emotion). Sounds like a lot of made up rules tied to points that don’t really matter.
So what can we do instead? Maybe the solution is to just participate in life, and when things aren’t working adjust what you do until they work for you and those around you. Maybe improvisation in life is a better answer than arbitrary rules and meaningless points.
