A few years ago I jotted down a note that said “external resources don’t solve internal problems.” This note predates my shift from military counterintelligence and law enforcement work to clinical mental health counseling and teaching. I like to think my education, training and experience has helped me refine this thought a bit. But it […]
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Seek first to understand. This is one of my favorite concepts because it implies gaining clarity by taking action. The first thing that comes to mind when I think about the concept of “seeking” is a RADAR system that used to cause me a lot of headaches when I was a young Airman. As a
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Each moment is a choice to live the life we want to live. We can’t change our choices in the past, but we can make a choice that helps us right now. It is a trap to wallow in our despair about past choices when we can step out of the mud and the muck
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The language we choose to describe the world to ourselves and others can be a powerful force in our lives. Our word choices can exaggerate risks and our fears. They can confuse or misdirect our emotions. They can also invoke clarity and understanding. If chosen with intent and purpose they can be a useful tool
Not starting is self selecting failure. A common perspective in the military is to have a “bias for action.” The cautious, security seeking portion of our mind will tell us “No just wait we need to know more before we begin.” That might be a trap and I would encourage you to challenge that hesitation.
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Want to be more content? Start by challenging the assumption that you should be ceaselessly pursuing pleasure and constantly avoiding pain. It might even be worth taking a look at the habits you have developed in seeking pleasures and avoiding challenges. Those habits might just be an indication that you are caught in the “this
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Peace of mind is the result of choosing a path that aligns with our values and then sticking with it despite the distraction and misdirection offered up by the world around us. Knowing our core values becomes a critical step in developing and living the life we want to live.
There are forces in the world, and inside us, that push and pull us. The defense against being harmed by these forces is to be clear on what we value so we can cut the strings of harmful influence and stop them from jerking us around like a puppet on a string.
To live the life you want to live, you must be the product of your sound judgement, well reasoned thoughts, and proper actions. This can’t happen if you allow yourself to think and act like you are the victim of your environment and circumstances.
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Habits are a double edged sword. On one side they can help us shape the life we want to live, while on the other they can deepen the ruts of our bad behavior. The good news is there is a simple test for any habit in our lives. All you have to do is reflect
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