Just because you have a temper does not mean you should have a tantrum. Frustration and anger are some seriously powerful emotions, and they can be useful for us… why else would we have them? Problems start to come up when we channel frustration and anger into behaviors that dig us into a hole, slam […]
Stop Throwing Tantrums Read More »
You don’t have to act on every thought you have or emotion you feel. Let me swing a little harder… acting on every thought you have or emotion you feel is not wise, respectable, helpful, or your right to do without consequence. What you can do with every single thought you have or emotion you
The only opportunity you have to be happy is right now. Look, I’m not even sure being happy all the time is the goal or even a potential reality… but feeling happy every now and then (or as often as possible) is pretty nice so let’s talk about it a bit. What is happiness? Well,
I like this concept as a general framework for understanding the temporal orientation of depression and anxiety to our thoughts. When we ruminate on the past we can start to feel down, guilty, ashamed, or angry. Dwelling on the future can lead us to feeling worried, uncertain, timid, or scared. Of course it can be
Depression lives in the past, and anxiety lives in the future Read More »
Let’s stop saying “change is hard.” I think I am at war with quippy platitudes… and “change is hard” is next on my list. The problem with this saying isn’t that it is wrong. Of course change can be hard. The problem is that when we throw around this type of superficial language we might
The Effect of saying “Change is Hard” Read More »
I really like the idea of thinking about our emotions as the fuel that powers our motivation engines. When you look at the fundamental principles for how an engine works it is basically a controlled explosion pushing a piston to generate mechanical force. For this process to work you need three critical components. Start with
Fuel for Motivation Read More »
I’ve been wrestling around with the ideas and concepts presented in Individual Psychology. Specifically with the idea of task separation. Task separation is the recognition that every individual has their own responsibility to manage their emotions, choices, and behaviors while avoiding taking on responsibility for other people’s emotions, choices, and behaviors. Problems begin to arise
What really happens when our emotions get out of control? In the moment we surge into some sort of action to express the intensity of our feelings in hopes of finding some catharsis or relief. Maybe we shout or cry. Maybe we lash out and become nasty and mean. Maybe we retreat and isolate. When
Out of Control Emotions Read More »
Let’s do some thinking about fear this morning. Fear is a core spectrum of emotions that help us respond to our perception of threats. These threats can be either real or imagined. Regardless of the source the physiological response is the same. Hyper focusing of the senses, quickened breathing, tense muscles, and increased blood pressure
The wise mind walks the middle path guided by logic on one side and intuition on the other. The Stoics often get judged and labeled as devoid of emotion. This couldn’t be further from the truth. They do however recognize that emotions must be regulated in order to harness their true power and benefit. The
Stoicism In Star Trek Read More »
