The past few weeks I’ve been trying out this idea of “doing” more. I’m not talking about adding more to my to-do list, the idea is to take more small deliberate actions to live the life I want to live. Maybe some examples will help me illustrate what I’m talking about. My wife and I […]
One of the trends I see in my role as a teacher and as a counselor is the harm that can be caused by oversimplification. Typically what I see is that someone will exaggerate their thoughts or emotions by using language that may speed up expression of thoughts and feelings but can also minimize or
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A few years ago I jotted down a note that said “external resources don’t solve internal problems.” This note predates my shift from military counterintelligence and law enforcement work to clinical mental health counseling and teaching. I like to think my education, training and experience has helped me refine this thought a bit. But it
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The Stoics practice of daily reflective journaling is something that I have never really come to terms with establishing as a regular habit. I’ve had fits and starts over the years with some success but mostly the practice devolves into a daily log of “what I did today.” I do like the idea of holding
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Seek first to understand. This is one of my favorite concepts because it implies gaining clarity by taking action. The first thing that comes to mind when I think about the concept of “seeking” is a RADAR system that used to cause me a lot of headaches when I was a young Airman. As a
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Each moment is a choice to live the life we want to live. We can’t change our choices in the past, but we can make a choice that helps us right now. It is a trap to wallow in our despair about past choices when we can step out of the mud and the muck
Wallowing in the past is not the answer Read More »
All other factors aside, the most important thing we do is make choices. This makes decision making one of, if not the most, critical skill we need to develop and grow.So how do we expand and refine our capability and capacity to make decisions? Decision making relies on the ability to think with a level
(Clarity + Complexity)Action = Progress Read More »
The language we choose to describe the world to ourselves and others can be a powerful force in our lives. Our word choices can exaggerate risks and our fears. They can confuse or misdirect our emotions. They can also invoke clarity and understanding. If chosen with intent and purpose they can be a useful tool
Not starting is self selecting failure. A common perspective in the military is to have a “bias for action.” The cautious, security seeking portion of our mind will tell us “No just wait we need to know more before we begin.” That might be a trap and I would encourage you to challenge that hesitation.
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Want to be more content? Start by challenging the assumption that you should be ceaselessly pursuing pleasure and constantly avoiding pain. It might even be worth taking a look at the habits you have developed in seeking pleasures and avoiding challenges. Those habits might just be an indication that you are caught in the “this
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